My Tom Cruise Doppelgänger Experience
According to most sources, a Doppelgänger is a sinister form of bi location. I always suspected that Tom Cruise was at the very least bi, but SINISTER?
No, the guy with the eyes of Tom Cruise and that weird, confident, smiley expression that offered me a free personality test on O’Connell Street in Dublin on Monday evening was not at all sinister. I pleaded with my wife to let me take him up on his offer as we waited at the crosswalk for the little green man to light up. We had a bus to catch so she was not very amenable to the idea.
He didn’t look EXACTLY like Tom Cruise. He looked like Tom Cruise with strawberry blond hair, which in retrospect does seem a bit sinister.
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As the Grand PoooBah of the Gay Leprechaun Defense league, I would like to request that you cease and desist all further utilizations of Gay Leprechauns with Tom Cruises face photo shopped in. Tom Cruise is vile monster that has repeatedly sacrifice, killed and eaten the hearts of GLDL members for the last 2 decades and we find it disgraceful to even insinuate that one of our brothers might look remotely like Tom Cruise.
We demand that you apologize by drafting a written apology on papyrus written with Goats milk ink. Your apology should be left underneath your pillow during the next full moon. We will retrieve it and push your apology through our apology approval process (as you know the GLDL is if nothing little sticklers for the rules and propriety ). You should expect either an approval for your apology or a Request For Resubmission within a fortnight. If a resubmission should be necessary, we kindly ask that you submit a photocopy of your original submission along with tracking number nailed to a tree at midnight in the local glen of your choice.
Comment by GayLeprechaunDefenseLeague — January 23, 2008 @ 9:33 pm
OMG!!! Can I have yer autograff?
And shave those eyebrows, man.
Comment by Mrs. Mecomber — January 30, 2008 @ 12:09 am
blond free…
Great post!!…
Trackback by blond free — February 2, 2008 @ 3:44 pm