I have been having some moderate success with another blog of mine and now I am depressed about the pitiful amount of readers that I entertain with this blog. If you are reading this right now, I love you. I really do. But I can’t stand those fickle people who make a decision each and every day NOT to visit TotalDismay.com.

I think that a lot of the people who don’t visit my site tend to check out PerezHilton.com. Those are the people that I should be targeting. At least I would know that the time they spend reading my blog wasn’t eroding the GDP or contributing to child neglect.

So, my plan is to steal readers from Perez Hilton. I am going to do this in a scientific way. I will try adopting one key aspect of Perez Hilton’s blog and measuring it’s effect on traffic. Today I am going to adopt the MS Paint method of making a regular photograph into a substantively changed commentary.

For a long time now, I have been taking every chance I could find to suggest to my readers that they avoid watching the MOST VIEWED on YouTube. I avoid it as much as possible. The last one I watched was the concert ending montage of home movies of a young Diana Spencer. For the most part the most viewed section of YouTube perpetuates mediocrity.

NoGoodTV is less than mediocre. I want to call them out as being a load’O'crap. They label the majority of their videos as ‘uncensored’… That is total crap. Their videos have to meet the terms of service set out by YouTube, who is owned by Google, who knows ALL about censorship.

Their tactic of putting ‘dirty version’ or ‘uncensored’ on all their videos is about as edgy as ‘You Can’t Do That On Television.’

The saddest part of this is that it works. This crappy television channel type of thing ( I don’t know if there is a TV channel, I don’t watch TV much ) almost always has several videos on the most viewed pages.

Just to use this as an example of how little I really care about celebrity news…

I had forgotten that this was the release date for Paris Hilton. She wasn’t in jail very long, but it was still long enough for me to lose interest in the fact that she was there.

I read all about the behind the scenes drama about who would get an exclusive interview. I have a theory that a few of the players didn’t really want to talk to her, they just wanted the publicity of being in talks with her.

Kathy Hilton told Fox News that her daughter has “never been alone so this is, as she calls it, a real time out.”

The idea of giving a child a Time Out was developed in the early 60’s by Montrose Wolf, PhD. and child psychologist Arthur Statts. Statts had the following synopsis of the technique in a 1968 work:

“I would put her in her crib and indicate that she had to stay there until she stopped crying. If we were in a public place, I would pick her up and go outside.”In brief, the idea is to keep the child isolated for a limited period of time, intended to allow it to calm down, learn coping skills and discourage inappropriate behavior. It is also a time for parents to separate feelings of anger toward the child for their behavior and develop a plan for discipline.”

Ideally, this technique is to be used consistently and start early in a child’s life. Waiting until your child is given a court ordered time out at the age of 26 is not effective parenting.

My parents didn’t do time outs and I still turned out ok. I was not as consistent as I should have been with disciplining my kids, but time outs have turned out to be one of the most effective techniques. The other really great tool is taking away electronics. I think Paris Hilton’s parents should have been doing this from the start. The World would be an entirely different place if Kathy had taken away her child’s night vision video camera.

Do you think that 23 days of time out is more or less than the total duration of all of the childhood time outs that Paris should have recieved? Time outs have been in use in my household for almost ten years. Guessing an average of ten minutes per day, that adds up to about 25 days of time outs. Apparently I am stricter than Kathy Hilton and the Los Angeles court system combined.

Sources: Boston Herald, Wikipedia

Many singer/songwriters have spent time in jail or prison. Quite a few of them draw from that experience with their music.

Johnny Cash landed in jail several times for misdemeanors, and some of his most famous performances were in front of prison inmates. One man that saw Johnny Cash live in San Quentin was Merle Haggard (who, incidentally is not cute AT ALL). Merle made a decision to devote his life to music after that event.

But Paris isn’t a country singer. I don’t even think her momma tried to raise her better. There is no shortage of pop and hip hop stars that have criminal records. Here is a good quote for Lyfe Jennings:

“Deeper situations tend to lead to deeper music and prison was one of those deeper situations. (Music) gave me an opportunity to express emotions in an unemotional environment.”

Here is a list of convicted musical artists and their crimes that I found on a page discussing whether people convicted of serious offenses should get airplay:

Franz Liszt: treason, seduction, debt

Johnny Cash: NA

Frank Morgan: NA

Vince Neil: dangerous driving resulting in death

Huddie Ledbetter: murder

James Brown: weapons, assault, failure to stop for police

Keith Richards: drugs

Paul McCartney: drugs

Rick James: sexual assault and torture

Merle Haggard: theft

Steve Earle: drugs

Aaron Neville: theft

Slick Rick: attempted murder, assault, illegal weapons

Chuck Berry: armed robbery, tax evasion

Tupac Shakur: rape

I think we should all take up a collection and get Paris a guitar, so she compose some really meaningful poignant songs, even better than her stellar debut album.

Ok, I am not going to bother with an indepth recounting of stuff here. The people who care will go to bigger sources.

I am left wondering if the judge is motivated by a desire for correction. That’s what they call the institution. Making a person stay in confinement for several days is supposed to let them know that what they did was not correct and that NOT doing it again is, well correct.

It was pretty obvious to me that the short stay would be looked at as ‘getting away with it’. This is what the judge wanted to prevent when he expressly ruled against house arrest in the first place.

Hello?

Is this thing working?

I have been experiencing a bit of a trough in blogosphere social activity. I am starting to get worried that it might be something I said. Can somebody please let me know if I have somehow made a blogging faux pas of some sort. Is there something smelly on my shoe?

What do people think about Paris Hilton being out of jail already? I think it is interesting that she is out because a psychologist made the diagnosis that she REALLY REALLY REALLY didn’t want to be in jail.

First off, a caveat…I think Sara Silverman is very sexy and Paris Hilton is just barely sexy at all.

This is my personal, superficial taste and their actual personalities do not play a huge role.

As far as judging these two people by their actions, I have a few points to make. Sarah Silverman is vulgar in her performances and she is most probably less vulgar in her everyday life. Paris Hilton is the opposite.

Sarah Silverman provided the voice for a Comedy Central puppet that got into some unusual situations. The link goes to a soundboard. Choose Hadassa Guberman for your character and see what Sarah can say about Oprah without cracking up. She is a professional.

Paris Hilton once tried to make the case that her public persona is pretty much a character and that she is not like that at all. I think she was telling a half truth. She is fake ALL the time, hence, by default, the person we see is her. In her defense, when the cameras aren’t on she is probably much worse.

This morning comes with the news that yet another young starlet has hit rock bottom. Lindsay Lohan was in a one car accident and she was arrested at a nearby hospital on suspicion of DUI. There was cocaine or something that looked a lot like it on the scene.

You know that teen drug abuse treatment is in the cards for this 21 year old girl whether it is voluntary or court mandated.

Echo Malibu takes a holistic and individualized approach to drug rehabilitation. The facility has experienced professional that treat the underlying causes of addiction, rather than just the resulting behaviors. Lindsay Lohan was in an alcoholics anonymous program during the months leading up to this life changing event. I suspect that she was not fully commuted to succeeding with that program and that it may not have been the best fit for her. I had a personal acquaintance who hit her rock bottom at 18 and went to a detox program with a bunch of grubby old men. They taught her how to play a few card games, but I don’t think she learned anything about herself. Peer counseling can be a very effective way of making people see things about themselves.

Gammonish wants to give Paris Hilton the gift of a backgammon game as a show of sympathy and support. They also feel that backgammon is a great way to pass the time. A judge gave Paris the gift of TIME. Originally it was scheduled to be an entire 45 days, but it is being reported that she now expects to serve only a portion of that term. But even a day or two requires some diversion to keep an active mind alive. Given the fact that Paris is addicted to the party lifestyle, she will probably be at loose ends most of the time.

I recently saw a picture of Paris Hilton reading The Art of War. Military tactics and backgammon strategies are quite similar. I have paid fairly close attention to the actions of Paris Hilton and I don’t think that the concept of strategy is foreign to her at all.

I have already wondered about whether Paris is going to have a cell mate. From the documentary footage of womens correctional facilities that I have observed it remains unclear whether board games are a common pastime. Hopefully the woman who shares a room with Paris will know how to play backgammon.

BackgammonMasters.com online game company is presently expanding worldwide. It is currently placing its attention and resources on Latin American markets.